I came back from this amazing blogging conference a little over two weeks ago full of ideas.
My to-do list was all over the kitchen, and I put a notepad next to my bed because random things would pop up in my head.
But really, I took notes at BEECH the old fashioned way and left them there in FL by mistake, and by the grace of God they were found by one of the wonderful people at Apologia. I just got them in the mail last week, and so my list of things to do were probably things I remembered hearing and didn’t want to lose.
Either way, things have been slow here. Or at least on the blog front it has.
I guess that’s how I process things. Some people are motivated and move within minutes on an idea, and things are rolling for them like the West Texas wind. I’m not that way, or at least not in the current stage I’m in.
I’d like to think at one point in my life I was able to jump into something with all my might and the feelings of satisfaction and reward came within minutes. But I’m not there any more. Especially since my two and a half month long trip to California.
The time in sunny SoCal changed me as a mom and as a person, and I work more hard at carrying over those lessons into our daily life here in Texas.
I’m learning to become satisfied with slow, and enjoy moments of silence. And I’m definitely wanting to master the art of listening to my children without technology interfering. That takes a lot of work for modern mommas. Don’t you agree?
Really though, what I’ve been processing from BEECH has been more than just gobs of notes, and ideas that seem greater than me and a little overwhelming.
I’ve been taking my time processing how to fit this space into a space that is incredibly sacred for me and my family- my home.
I want my kids to draw pictures of me playing with them, or me with my crazy morning hair fixing them a hot breakfast. Not ones with me behind a computer screen.
I don’t want my husband to feel like at the end of the day when the kids are asleep, I’m unavailable. I’ve checked out because there’s something more interesting to look at than his eyes that tell me I’m loved.
I want to live life, and the words that pour out on a computer screen be an overflow from what’s done when nobody is looking. It takes work, and most of all it takes time. And the hardest part is figuring it all out as I go.
So if progression is slow here, it’s because I am my own accountability partner and I know how well I am as a mom and wife when I’m here constantly. Excitement is quickly extinguished when I can give this space a plethora of words, but the only ones I can muster out to my family is, “hold on.”
This is how I process things now. Slow, quietly, and with a lot of pondering.
How about you? Are you one who has to jump on ideas quickly or you lose them, or are you a turtle- like me?